By Ben Nedde
A retired teacher of English wrote, There is no egg in eggplants, nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren’t invented in England or French fries in France. Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren’t sweet, are meat. We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. And why is it that writers write but fingers don’t fing; grocers don’t groce and hammers don’t ham?
If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn’t the plural of booth beeth?
One goose, two geese. So one moose, two meese?. Doesn’t it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend? If teachers taught, why don’t preachers praught?
If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?
Sometimes I think all English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane. You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which, an alarm goes off by going on.
If the plural of mouse is mice why not the plural of house be hice since both are Noun?
Why are we referring to ‘Building’ when it’s already built? What is the real name of Flies (insects)? When I say, I want to fly does it imply that I want to become an insect? Too many contradictions
When the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible. And why, when I wind up my watch, I start it, but when I wind up this essay, I end it?’
Amazing right?
English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race, which, of course, is not a race at all.’
More Amazing English…
Many parts of the body can be used as verbs in either a physical or a metaphorical sense.
You can head a company, but if things go wrong you’ll have to shoulder the blame or face your investors.
A good leader will back his employees, but if you don’t toe the line the management can skin you.
Did you muscle your way into that job?
You might eye someone suspiciously, or wait for the police to finger a suspect. But if you need to get out of town, you can thumb a ride or you can ride with me if you can stomach the thought.
Use strong-arm tactic if you want to elbow out someone.
I don’t always sing along with the radio, but I sometimes do mouth the words.
(To all English-Language Lovers)
