By Emmanuel O. Fashakin, M.D., Esq.
It was 2022, my first day back at work after a long vacation. My third patient of the day walked into the consulting room.
“Please, have a seat, sir,” I said.
“I’m actually a woman,” came the quick correction.
I had already logged into the electronic medical record system, and as her file loaded, I immediately realised my mistake. Of course—Karen was a woman.
At the time, our clinic still required everyone to wear face masks, making facial recognition more difficult. Besides, Karen’s appearance had thrown me off. You cannot tell from her dressing because, not only was she dressed like a man, she dressed like a very tough man. More like someone you would expect to see in a boxing gym than a doctor’s office.
Karen is a lesbian. She lived with her female partner and her younger brother, and worked two jobs to support the household.
She had also been a professional kickboxer.
That career had come at a steep price.
Years of punishment in the ring had left both knees severely damaged. Imaging studies, including X-rays and an MRI, confirmed advanced degenerative changes. We had referred her to an orthopaedic surgeon, who treated her conservatively with medication and intra-articular injections for pain relief. This visit was to obtain a referral for a second opinion.
Looking at Karen, now 46, you would hardly guess the extent of the damage. She still looked formidable. You certainly wouldn’t want to meet her in a dark alley.
Then again, if you had a head start, you could probably outrun her.
Her knees were that bad.
The orthopaedic surgeon had declined to perform knee replacement surgery. In his view, Karen was simply too young. Artificial knees have a limited lifespan, particularly in younger, active patients, often lasting about a decade before revision surgery becomes necessary. There are only so many times surgeons can replace worn-out joints before the underlying bone no longer provides adequate support.
Karen had already taken more of my clinic time than I had planned for that busy morning, so I almost forgot to ask about her younger brother.
The last time we met, he had been struggling with severe mental health problems.
Karen sighed.
She had come home from work one evening to discover her brother in bed with her partner.
For a moment, I was speechless.
“My goodness,” I finally managed. “What did you do?”
“Oh my goodness!” “I’m Sorry to hear that”, I finally told Karen after I found my voice. “So what did you do to them? ”
“Oh, I cursed them out and packed my stuff and left”.
“You left?” “You let your brother snatch your wife?
She nodded, looking sad and helpless
Then she asked, “What else could I do, Doctor?”
There was no anger in her voice by then—only disappointment and resignation.
Trying to lighten the mood, I said, “Well… it’s all in the family. At least your brother can give her something you couldn’t. Maybe they’ll even have children.”
Karen looked at me without smiling.
My attempt at humour had missed its mark completely.
She didn’t want philosophical explanations.
She didn’t want consolation.
My words were of little comfort; she just wants her wife back!
Sometimes, even after years of practising medicine, you are reminded that the deepest wounds are not the ones revealed by an MRI or an X-ray.
They are the ones no scan can ever detect.
Emmanuel O. Fashakin, M.D., FMCS (Nig), FWACS, FRCS (Ed), FAAFP, Esq.
Attorney at Law & Medical Director
Abbydek Family Medical Practice, P.C.
web address: http://www.abbydek.com
Cell phone: +1-347-217-6175
