By Lillian Okenwa
Despite increased awareness, domestic violence is a pattern of abusive behaviour in intimate relationships where one partner seeks control and power over the other remains prevalent with the fear of “What will I do without him? What will people say if I leave? How will I make ends meet? What about my children?”, dominating the reasons why most women remain in toxic and abusive relationships.
Many women have lost count of how many times their husbands hit them; some leading to being hospitalized so many times. Yet they feel trapped and remain.
The story of Charity Nwafor a housewife who was allegedly killed by her 40-year-old husband, Joshua Nwafor following a dispute over a tuber of yam on 16 December 2024, in Nsokkara, Ezza South Local Government Area of the state is pathetic.
Although Joshua hails from the Nsokkara community, Charity was a native of Awkuzu, Onicha Local Government Area of the state. They had been married for 17 years. They have children.
An eyewitness told Daily Sun that Joshua brought out a tuber yam to be cooked for the entire family, but Charity told him that she would prefer to roast it as she did not want to eat boiled yam. That was how the trouble started.
“The man brought out yam to be cooked for the entire family to eat, and the wife told him that she was not going to eat the cooked one, that she preferred roasted one, and went ahead to roast the yam.
“As a result, the man got angry and dragged her into the room, locked the door, and beat her till she gave up the ghost.
“I am one of the advocates for walking out of a marriage instead of dying in such a marriage. Life has no duplicate. No matter how old that marriage is, when it becomes life-threatening, please find your way. Leave very fast and never mind what people would say,” the eyewitness said.
The Ebonyi State Police Command Spokesperson, DSP Joshua Ukandu, condemned the tragic incident. “This is sad. Let me confirm if it’s being handled by the command, but rest assured that the command will conduct a thorough investigation and charge whoever is found wanting,” he stated.
Posting on social media, one Virginia Nweke expressed sorrow over the death of Charity who she referred to as her sister.
In an article published by Vanguard Newspaper, Joy Efefairoro, gave some insightful tips on how domestic violence could be ameliorated.
Engaging Men and Boys in various activities around their environment: Recognising that domestic violence is not solely a women’s issue, engaging men and boys in the conversation is paramount. Educational programmes that challenge toxic masculinity and promote healthy and egalitarian relationships can reshape societal attitudes, discouraging violence and fostering empathy and respect.
Economic Empowerment: Economic dependence often traps survivors in abusive relationships. By providing vocational training, microfinance initiatives, and income-generating opportunities, we can empower women economically, enabling them to leave abusive environments and create a secure future for themselves and their children.
Strengthening Law Enforcement: It is crucial to ensure that law enforcement agencies are equipped with the proper resources, training, and sensitisation to effectively respond to cases of domestic violence. This includes establishing specialised units within the police force to handle such cases and encouraging survivors to report incidents without fear of victim-blaming or retribution.
Engaging Religious and Traditional Leaders: Religious and traditional leaders exert significant influence in Nigerian society. Their support and active involvement in condemning domestic violence and advocating for gender equality can create a powerful impact. Collaboration between these leaders, civil society organisations, and the government can lead to the implementation of effective programmes and initiatives that challenge harmful norms.
Access to Justice: Many survivors of domestic violence face barriers when seeking justice, including a lack of access to legal aid and lengthy legal processes. By establishing legal support services, increasing the number of trained personnel, and promoting efficient court systems, survivors can navigate the legal process more effectively and seek redress for their grievances.
Media and Technology: The media can play a vital role in raising awareness about domestic violence in Nigeria. Harnessing the power of television, radio, social media, and other channels to disseminate information, share survivor stories, and challenge societal attitudes can help break the silence surrounding the issue and encourage public discourse.
Male Allies and Role Models: Engaging men as allies in the fight against domestic violence is crucial. By promoting positive masculinity, encouraging men to be active bystanders, and providing mentorship programmes for young boys, we can help reshape gender norms and prevent the cycle of violence from continuing into future generations.
Collaboration and Partnerships: Combating domestic violence requires collaboration among various stakeholders, including government agencies, NGOs, community leaders, healthcare providers, and educational institutions. By pooling resources, expertise, and ideas, these partnerships can create a comprehensive response to domestic violence, ensuring survivors receive the support they need.
Data Collection and Research:-Enhancing data collection mechanisms and conducting research on domestic violence is essential for evidence-based policymaking. Gathering comprehensive data on the prevalence, causes, and consequences of domestic violence can inform targeted interventions and improve the overall response to the issue. By implementing a multi-dimensional approach that encompasses legislation, education, support services, engagement of key stakeholders, and data-driven decision-making, Nigeria can make significant strides in combating domestic violence. It is crucial for society at large to recognise that domestic violence is a violation of human rights that affects everyone, and collective action is necessary to foster a culture of respect, equality, and safety for all individuals.
Domestic violence remains a pressing issue in Nigeria, but concerted efforts can instigate change and create a society free from violence. By addressing the root causes, implementing legislation, raising awareness, establishing support services, and fostering economic empowerment, Nigeria can pave the way towards gender equality and empower survivors to break free from the cycle of violence. It is the duty of individuals, communities, and the government to come together and work towards creating a safer and more inclusive Nigeria for all.
