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​​​​​Threat to life: NBA Garki Abuja condemns attacks on Nigerialawyer’s publisher

The Nigerian Bar Association Garki Branch, Abuja has condemned the alleged threat to the life of Chioma Unini, the publisher of Nigerialawyer.

Calling out the perpetrators, the branch in a 3rd June 2023, statement signed by its Branch Chairman, Obioma Ezenwobodo Esq.​​​​ said it is “reprehensible and heinous to attempt to gag Chioma from exercising her right to journalism and free press.”

The full statement reads:

CONDEMNATION OF THE THREAT TO LIFE OF THE FOUNDER AND PUBLISHER OF THE NIGERIALAWYER’S CHIOMA UNINI. K

 The attention of the Branch has been drawn to a series of text messages threatening the life and safety of Chioma Unini. K, a consummate Lawyer based in Abuja and the founder and publisher of the NigeiraLawyer (a news blog centred on law and other social issues) over her pragmatic and objective news reportage.

The Branch condemns in strong terms the threat messages directed against the person of Chioma as they are not only injurious to the fundamental right of every citizen to freedom of expression and the press as provided in section 39(1) of the Constitution of the Federal Republic of Nigeria 1999 (as Altered) but contrary to section 22 of the same Constitution that provides: “The press, radio, television and other agencies of the mass media shall at all times be free to uphold the fundamental objectives contained in this Chapter and uphold the responsibility and accountability of the Government to the people.”

The Branch states that on no account should Chioma be harassed or threatened in the cause of carrying out her duty which is geared towards deepening democratic ideals. It is therefore reprehensible and heinous to attempt to gag Chioma from exercising her right to journalism and free press.

The Branch calls on the security agencies to investigate the matter and bring the culprits behind the ugly trend to book.

Obioma Ezenwobodo Esq.​​​​

        (Chairman)

Photo News: NBA Abuja June meeting

The meeting chaired by the Chairman of the Branch, Afam Okeke, Esq had several dignitaries, senior members of the Bar, and respected members of the branch in attendance.

NBA Abuja and Police Service Commission ruminate on collaborations and partnerships

The Nigerian Bar Association (NBA) Abuja branch officers led by its Chairman Afam O. Okeke, Esq.  paid a courtesy visit to the Chairman, Police Service Commission (PSC), Dr. Solomon Ehigiator Arase, (IGP Rtd.) in his Abuja office to discuss possible between the NBA and PSC.

Mr. Okeke congratulated Dr. Arase on his appointment as PSC Chairman and thanked him for being the Keynote Speaker of the NBA Abuja 2022 Law Week Programme. Okeke also praised Arase for the good legacies he left as the Inspector General of Police. The Branch assured Mr. Arase of NBA Abuja’s support and expressed confidence in his ability to deliver on his mandate as PSC Chairman.

On his part, the PSC Chairman who is a registered member of the NBA Abuja branch also expressed his appreciation of the Branch officers for the visit and suggested collaboration in areas of training of its officers especially for capacity building, upgrade of the status of policemen called to the bar, and more.

He further encouraged the Branch officers to advise lawyers to stop writing petitions criminalizing civil cases.

In all, the Branch and PSC agreed to work together in the interest of the society.

Intimate Affairs: The problem with long courtships

By Funke Egbemode

Let me start with a confession. I am a closet romantic. I love red roses and blue violets. I love petal-strewn, candle-lit scenes. I love to be wined and dined in exotic places. Everyone close to me knows that my vacations are incomplete without a beach and or a beachfront hotel room. The full works. Life is to be lived and what’s a well lived life as a woman if she has not been wowed by scented candles and exotic dinner on a beach? Every man, every woman must look back, at least once, and smile at the days leading to marriage and bless the day they found their partners. But I am a realist and I do not believe in long courtships heading nowhere. No, No matter how purple a relationship is, I do not believe in time-wasters.

Dating without a wedding date within sight is totally dumb unless what either of the parties involved has in mind is a fling. If it’s fling, by all means, have fun. Do your crazy things, feed your fantasies. But if you have both agreed that this is for keeps and you are each other’s final bus stops, then do what needs to be done, put a ring on it. Smart girls should date smart. Just like working smart yields better rewards than working hard, dating smart is better than dating hard. Long courtships are just long hard things that should be given a wide berth.

Sure, it is important to look before you leap and every girl should do her due diligence before she says ‘I do’ or even ‘I don’t’. I just don’t see the diligence in looking for years without leaping. It is neither due nor diligent if you allow a man to test-drive you until your tires are worn. That would be based on what logic? Yes, short and sharp courtship can leave you jumping into a ditch but who said you can know everything about a woman or a man just because you have been dating for five years? What smart girl allows herself to be ‘dated’ for five years, anyway?

Whatever you think is the downside of a short courtship, a long courtship is still bad. And before you come up with the archaic argument of how a woman needs to study a man, show me a wife who can swear that she absolutely knew her man before she said ‘ I do.’ Men are closed books and you can’t judge them by their macho covers. It takes time to know a man. Okay, and a woman too. So? Short courtships are not good for anybody. Neither is long courtship. The sane thing is to stay in the middle of the long and the short courtship.

Find a middle road. It’s either a relationship is serious or it is not. You are either heading for the altar or the rocks. If you are dating a man and in all of the 52 weeks that make a year, you don’t smell seriousness, you’ve been had. Cut your losses and take a walk. The earlier, the better. Hanging on to nothing is foolishness and you know what is most saddening? Most women in relationships that are going nowhere are actually aware of the fact. They are just too afraid to cut loose; you know all that nonsense about ‘where do I start from’ bla bla bla. If you don’t end a bad affair while time is still on your side, you are liable to end up a lonely irritable old maid, by which time it would be too late to start anywhere.

Let me also stress here that long courtships are even worse for men. A trusting guy could end up with a playgirl who just loves the idea of love while ‘cutting shows’ at the expense of the well-brought-up son of good parents. There are bad girls all over the place, let’s admit it. Some are even so frivolous or mean or both that you wonder if they were born like that. You know I’ve always said all girls are born good, that it is the men that ruin their pinks with their dark hearts. But my eyes have seen things in this city. These pretty little things wearing false this and that and calling every guy ‘baby’ are trouble propelled by turbo engines. They are cute and smooth. I have also concluded that they know how to keep their men strapped to their bedposts which is why some men who graduated with First Class at age 21 become ‘mumu’ in their scented hands. The bobo is all brains when you meet him in his expansive office during the day but you wait for his girlfriend to sashay through the door and his brains simply shuts down. He follows her all over the place like a puppy, wagging his fluffy tail.

We must re-orientate our boys that being book-smart without being street-wise is bad for their hearts. A girl who keeps fencing her boyfriend of two years from meeting her family is a suspect. If all she wants is to eat at all the fancy restaurants in the city, be spoilt silly on her birthday and pampered to an inch of her life at Valentine without making any moves towards Nikkah or the altar, take a step back, son, and reassess the situation. If all the plan she wants to make with you is about her getting the latest designer fragrance or a weekend to de-stress in Zanzibar, dude, you just might be the latest ‘maga’ in town.

A beautiful woman aware of what she can reel in with her shapely ‘fronters’ and eye-popping backside is dangerous for a serious-minded guy, loaded and looking to settle down. Girls like the perfect gentleman who treats them like ladies but a greedy one who has a side-Aristo is prone to take advantage of a good man, turning a short trip into a wander in the wilderness.

Of course, long courtship is bad business for any right thinking woman, and it won’t be because of lack of patience on a girl’s part. It’s simply and totally about common sense. Letting a man dangle you on his key string is dumb, dangerous and a bloody waste of time, and time is what a woman doesn’t always have.

A long courtship going nowhere strips a woman of her dignity and self-esteem. Because she is hoping that tomorrow will persuade him to make an honest woman of her, she ignores other eligible males. Because she thinks he’d propose at the next valentine dinner, she discourages the real Mr Right. She reads stupid meanings into everything he says or does even when the bloke is just having fun. For instance, she mistakes his presence at her mother’s 60th birthday for commitment of an ‘acting son-in-law’. Nonsense, it’s just another party for him. So what if he attended with his friends? Did he not attend parties the previous weekend?

If you play wifey at weekends while he plays the field all week, he’s not the man you think he is. If after three years of dating, he is still pussy-footing about ordinary introduction ceremony, cut him loose before his bad ways ruin your self-esteem. That he won’t propose does not mean you are not a wife material. He’s just not the groom meant for you. You can’t remain his plaything forever while he enjoys the best of both worlds. A man who leads a young woman on, knowing he would not marry her was badly brought up by his mother and his father taught him nothing. A woman who strings a good man along is sowing evil seeds for her daughters to reap later. If this long date is leading to a dark alley, the time to turn back is now.

▪︎Egbemode ([email protected])

President Museveni and Africa’s Political Culture Wars

By Chidi Anselm Odinkalu

In the 37th year of his interminable rule, President Yoweri Museveni signed into law Uganda’s Anti-Homosexuality Act, passed by Parliament earlier in the month. Among other things, the new law prescribes life in prison for persons convicted of homosexuality, a crime that already exists in Uganda’s laws. It also creates a new crime of “aggravated homosexuality” punishable with death; explicitly precludes a defence of consent for crimes under the law, and makes it possible to convict for homosexuality, children who are otherwise excluded from criminal responsibility under Ugandan law.

Describing the law as “a shameful Act” and “a tragic violation of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights”, US President, Joe Biden, a Catholic, ordered a wide-ranging review of development assistance with Uganda, which may extend to “the application of sanctions and restriction of entry into the United States against anyone involved in serious human rights abuses or corruption.” From Uganda, Speaker of Parliament, the exquisitely named Anita Among, who presided over the passage of the law shot back, saying: “I get a lot of threats, we are going to lose out on Aids drugs…aid is going to be cut off, tourism, export…I said, so what? That you are going to be blocked from going to America, do I need to go to America?” 

In this excitable back and forth, not much attention has been paid to its contents. The Anti-Homosexuality Act, as its title indicates, sets out to make it clear that the government of Yoweri Museveni is against homosexuality and the law expends excruciating energy to make this clear. The text makes for interesting reading.  

The Act begins with a spectacular feat of reductionism, describing a “homosexual” as “a person who engages in an act of homosexuality.” So, the act makes the person but what then is homosexuality? The Act says it “means the performance of a sexual act on a person by another person of the same sex.” This requires us then to understand what a “sexual act” means. The Act obliges, describing a sexual act as “the stimulation or penetration, however slight, of a person’s anus or mouth by a sexual organ of another person of the same sex”, and extends to such stimulation or penetration whether procured by “a sex contraption” or by “any part of the body of a person of the same sex.”

If you are tired or confused by this complex labyrinth of definitions, the Act is not yet done because you still do not yet know what a “sexual organ” is. Well, in Uganda, according to this new law, a sexual organ is “in the case of a female person”, a vagina and, “in the case of a male person” a penis. Just to be sure that we are all on the same page, the Act tacks back to define “female person” as “a person born with a female sexual organ” and a “male person” as “a person born with a male sexual organ.”

On the whole, the Act chases down a drafting rabbit hole in pursuit of its rabid objectives. Anyone could easily choose to be detained by the tendency of its drafters to reduce sexual identity to the external manifestations of its terminals in the human genitalia or to one act. But that is only one of the numerous problems with this new Ugandan law. If a piece of legislation needs at least six different sets of definitions of diminishing exactitude in order to explain the object of its prohibitions, it is unlikely to pass the test of clarity or certainty, which is constitutive of criminal prohibition. The crime created by this new law is worse than witchcraft, which, by the way, Uganda’s courts ruled unconstitutional 24 years ago for lack of clarity.

It is easy to default to generalisations about African cultures to explain the kinds of developments in Uganda. A related point of view could be that such developments are about deeply held “African values”.

This, certainly, is the view of the African Union. In 2015, after eight years of refusal, the African Commission on Human and Peoples’ Rights, Africa’s primary continental human rights body, voted by a narrow majority to grant Observer Status to the Coalition of African Lesbians (CAL), an organization lawfully registered in South Africa. Promptly, the foreign ministers of the African Union (AU) decided that this was “an attempt to impose values contrary to the African values” and ordered the Commission to lift the Observer Status granted to the CAL in consonance with “African values”.

When the Commission demurred, the AU threatened to withdraw its funding. In the end, the Commission wilted under overwhelming sovereign pressure and withdrew the Observer Status granted to CAL. Surprisingly, South Africa, in whose territory CAL was lawfully registered, refused to raise a finger in defence of its laws and constitutional values. Since these events, the Commission has now adopted the doctrinal position that the advancement of rights relating to human sexuality is “contrary to the virtues of African values.” 

In reality, this recent slew of laws on human sexuality across Africa is very much about politics. Museveni’s most recent anti-homosexuality law is only the latest in a continent in which rulers in trouble instigate culture and identity wars (framed in faux Pentecostalism) to re-energize their political fortunes. This is not the first time President Museveni has signed such a law. Uganda’s courts struck down a similar law on anti-homosexuality passed in a haste one decade earlier when they found that parliament had passed it without quorum.

Elsewhere around Africa, the timing of Nigeria’s Same Sex (Prohibition) Act passed around the same time in 2014, coincided with a terminal dip in the fortunes of then President, Goodluck Jonathan. In Ghana, the Promotion of Proper Human Sexual Rights and Ghanaian Family Values Bill, 2021, on the cusp of passage into law happens to coincide with a season in which the political fortunes of President Nana Akuffo-Addo’s New Patriotic Party (NPP) are at an all-time low. In Kenya, a Family Protection Bill very much of the same ilk as its Ghana and Uganda counterparts has been introduced in parliament as the political honeymoon of President William Ruto comes to an end.

Those who are minded to reach conclusions from these developments would be well advised to make haste slowly. Same-sex sexual relations are currently lawful in 22 African countries. Last month, Namibia’s Supreme Court ruled in favour of granting legal recognition to same-sex marriages contracted abroad. In February, Kenya’s Supreme Court held that advocacy for the rights of sexual minorities was constitutionally protected and that groups involved in that could not be denied registration as NGOs. In November 2021, Botswana’s highest court decriminalized same-sex sexual relations.

In Nigeria, the Criminal Law of Lagos State achieved exactly the same goal in 2015. Similarly, the Violence against Persons Prohibition Act passed by Nigeria’s National Assembly a mere 15 months after the Same Sex Marriage (Prohibition) Act makes rape a unisex offence, which can be committed by men or women against one another or against persons of the same sex. Implicitly, therefore, it retained the prohibition against same sex sexual relations only if there was an absence of consent, actual or presumptive, effectively decriminalizing homosexuality as a federal offence in Nigeria. 

This is far from the unified picture that the partisans in Africa’s emerging theatre of political culture wars would have us to believe. The notion of “African values” is as invented as the idea of “homophobic Africa” is unreal. What we have is a very nuanced and highly contested territory in the continent. It is too early to know how this could end. What is clear, however, is that Africans will ultimately resolve these issues on their own continent and that is as it should be.

A lawyer and a teacher, Odinkalu can be reached at [email protected]

First European sex championship holds June 8, as Sweden declares sex as sport

In a move that will leave many jaws dropping, Sweden has not only declared sex as a sport but gearing up for the first European Sex Championship coming up on June 8.

According to the Swedish Sex Federation, the Championship will span over several weeks and will feature participants competing for 6 hours every day.

Reports claim that the participants will have 45 minutes to an hour to engage with their matches or activities.

Already 20 participants people from different countries have applied for the Championship.

A judges panel has been set to decide the winners of the competition but there is a twist in the game, the audience present at these matches will also have a say on the decision. Judges and the audience will consider factors such as good communication skills between a couple, their endurance level, the chemistry they share, and their knowledge about sex.

In each discipline, participants can score between 5 and 10 points. The contestants will compete in 16 fields which include seduction, oral sex, penetration, appearance, body massages, exploring erotic zones, position changes, creativity in the positions, number of orgasms, endurance, knowledge of the erogenous zones, and more.

The European Sex Championship values diversity and accepts competitors of any gender or sexual orientation. The organisers have emphasised that sexual orientation can play a strategic role in this sport, which they believe will be adopted by other European countries in the future.

“The incorporation of sexual orientation as a part of sporting tactics will be a groundbreaking development among European countries,” stated the competition organiser.

Dragan Bratych, president of the Swedish Federation of Sex, expressed his belief that the recognition of sex as a sport was inevitable. He highlighted the potential for physical and mental well-being through sexual activity, emphasizing the importance of training.

“Just like any other sport, achieving desired results in sex requires training. Therefore, it is only logical for people to start competing in this domain as well,” Bratych explained to the media.

Participants should be well versed with the Kamasutra and all the rules and sexual artistry that it speaks about. If these participants are able to demonstrate the rules and regulations of Kamasutra in their sexual act that they will have to put on display then the more points they will get.

For those who are not aware, Kamasutra is a Sanskrit scripture that sheds light on topics such as sexuality and eroticism. It is imperative that the participants in the Swedish sex competition are able to showcase their know-how and knowledge of sex.

Netizens have shared mixed reactions about this competition, while some are of the opinion that this is indeed an act of inclusivity others believe that is a tad much and could have been well avoided. What do you think?

Credits: Times of India and News18

Petroleum subsidy in Nigeria more injurious than coups, civil war, insurgency and banditry combined, By Nkereuwem Akpan

“Subsidy is a massive scam that impoverished the poor, enriched the Independent Marketers and their front men.”

This argument that subsidy benefits the poor is based on a faulty premise and truly doesn’t worth the space it is typed on, any space that is. The subsidy regime as has been applied in Nigeria has been one massive scam that has benefited the super-rich and impoverished the poor.

Petroleum subsidy in Nigeria is far more injurious to the average Nigerian than all the military coups, civil war, insurgency, and banditry combined. Here’s why.

Federal Government paid the independent marketers in excess of N8 trillion in 5 years as subsidy for ‘importing’ finished petroleum products into Nigeria

As a result of this importation, the independent marketers collude with NNPC top guns to sabotage the four Refineries and stop them from performing optimally because if the refineries can get to even 30% performance capacity, there will be no need to import finished products in the first place.

Secondly, the Federal Government of Nigeria has spent almost N7 trillion on Turn Around Maintenance (TAM) on the refineries over 8 years but again sabotaged by the same independent marketers.

Thirdly independent marketers claim more than six times the value of the actual volume of products imported and get the difference between the landing cost of the product and the pump price.

Fourthly, despite being paid the difference between the landing cost and the pump price as subsidy, these rogue independent marketers will still divert the products to neighbouring African nations and sell these products at four times the price sold in the local markets. So, at the end of the day, the Federal Government of Nigeria pays subsidy to the whole of Africa. That is the madness.

This has been going on for over 20 years now.

This is why the Petroleum Industry Act (PIA) was enacted to cure and the subsidy regime is effectively coming into effect on June 30th because, in the 2023 Appropriation Act, there is no provision for subsidy beyond June.

Nkereuwem Akpan, Esq. is an Abuja lawyer.

Naira rain as Buhari’s children spray cash to mark dad’s exit

Rights activist and public affairs analyst Senator Shehu Sani, has reacted to a viral video where children of former President Muhammadu Buhari, were seen spraying cash on a band during the celebration of their father’s exit from the presidency.

Senator Sani shared Mahdi Shehu’s tweet with the video on his official Twitter page.

See tweet and video.

https://twitter.com/ShehuSani/status/1664331904504438789?s=20

Earlier in the year, Hon. Justice Chukwujekwu Aneke of the Federal High Court sitting in Ikoyi, Lagos ordered the remand of Oluwadarasimi Omoseyin, a 31-year-old Nigerian actress who was said to have sprayed naira notes at a public event.

She was apprehended by operatives of the Independent Corrupt Practices and Other Fraud Related Offences Commission(ICPC) on Wednesday, February 1, 2023, along Awolowo Road, Ikoyi, Lagos.

Not too long ago, a viral video showing the President’s daughter, Hanan Buhari dancing with her groom while being sprayed with money at her wedding made the rounds. Nigerians took to social media to make various comments regarding the event, stressing that while the law was being violated at the presidential villa, the Central Bank of Nigeria (CBN) has been campaigning against the abuse of the Naira, with penalties for anyone found culpable of this offence.

Hanan Buhari and husband at her wedding

Watch video

In Nigeria. it’s different rules for different people. The rich and powerful always win.

“I caught my wife cheating on me with my dad through a baby monitor”

A man has described how he caught his wife cheating with his own father – with the couple now expecting twins.

Declan Fuller said his life turned into a real-life Eastenders plot after claiming to have caught his wife Stephanie, 22, and father Darren, 44, acting cozy on the baby monitor.

The 22-year-old, who shares a two-year-old daughter, Willow, with Stephanie says he caught her sneaking into a bedroom for an afternoon romp with his own father.

But Stephanie claims the pair were just watching The Simpsons on TV in the same room at their home in the Rhondda, South Wales.

Ex funeral worker Declan said: “It’s sick — how could my father do that to me? It’s like a plot from EastEnders. It’s not normal.”

Declan grew suspicious after divorced Darren moved in with the young couple and their daughter Willow, last September.

Darren Fuller pictured with Stephanie who his now expecting twins(The Sun / News Licensing)

Two months later when he used his phone to check the monitor at home focusing the webcam on his dad’s bedroom door, he told The Sun.

He said spotting them using the same room for a prolonged period of time confirmed his suspicions, and ended the relationship.

Jobless Stephanie and Darren went on to embrace their newfound love, and are now expecting twins.

Declan said: “I feel sorry for the babies, they are coming into a very mixed-up family.”

The twins will be Declan’s half-brother or sister and Willow’s brother or sister but also her aunt or uncle and Darren will be Willow’s grand­father and stepdad.

The Conclave/Mirror UK

Former Super Eagles coach graduates with first class at 70

One-time coach of Nigeria’s Under-20 and assistant coach of the Super Eagles during the 2002 Korea /Japan World Cup just graduated with a first-class degree from the University of Jos (UniJos), in the capital city of Plateau State.

The 70-year-old Ben Duamlong said he enrolled into the degree programme out of passion for education after his retirement as a football coach.

Duamlong who studied painting at the university, a completely different field from what he has done most of his life was among the 112 students who bagged first-class degrees out of 20,532 students that graduated from UniJos in 2023.

The former coach explained his motivation. “What prompted me to go back to the university at this age is because of my passion for art. All my life, I have always drawn but never painted. I like painting. I can draw but I can’t paint.

“So, after retiring in 2014, as a footballer, I stayed home doing nothing. That is why I decided to go back to school.”